Lady Hazel’s Tea Shoppe

Dear Lady Hazelton, 

I am having a rough time getting enough sleep with all the homework I have. I get distracted often, so all that homework takes even longer. When I do all my homework and finish it at night, I end up staying up super late. I then get super tired the next day, which makes me fall asleep in the afternoon. This only pushes back my homework and therefore my sleep as well. It ruins my sleep schedule for the whole week! 

So, Lady Hazelton, here is my question for you: Do I sacrifice my sleep to keep up with school work, or do I go to bed at a decent time, leaving some homework unfinished for the next day? These both seem like pretty bad options, so please help me with my struggle!

Write back soon!
Sleep or School

Dearest Sleep or School,

Ah, the vicious cycle of homework, sleep deprivation, repeat… truly a cursed brew. But let me spill the tea: sacrificing sleep for schoolwork is like over-steeping a delicate Earl Grey – bitter  and entirely unnecessary.

The real enemy here? Distractions. Your homework isn’t the problem; it’s the side quests pulling you away. Put your phone in “Do Not Disturb” jail, romanticize the grind with a cozy playlist, and power through like the academic legend you are. Set a bedtime like it’s a non-negotiable VIP event (because it is), and anything unfinished can be handled with well-rested brain cells the next day.

TL;DR: Work smarter, not sleepier. Your grades will thank you, and so will your under-eye bags.

Steeped in wisdom and eight hours of rest,
Lady Hazelton

Dear Lady Hazelton,

I know that I speak for majority of kids my age when I say- I have such a hard time putting my phone down. I don’t struggle with this as much during social situations but I’ve really noticed it when I try to lock in for school work. Whether it be studying for midterms, doing my homework, reading a textbook, or writing an essay, I cannot manage to stay focused on it without running to my phone every few minutes. I’ve found that turning my phone on do not disturb doesn’t help because I just swipe up on my home screen to make sure I didn’t miss anything while my notifications are turned off. I tried putting my phone with my mom or dad in another room but even that makes my inner dialogue turn to “I wonder if they’re gonna see a notification go off” or “what if they try to go on my phone.” Obviously I have nothing to hide, it’s just that I don’t like not having it next to me. I probably sound so grossly “teenager” right now but I KNOW I’m not alone in this. Sometimes playing music or putting on a Netflix show just for background noise helps ease the temptation a bit but even that can get distracting. Just wondering if you have any tips for genuinely bettering focus and lessening my attachment to my phone, specifically when working on school related things.

Thank you so much,
Hopelessly Plugged In

Dearest Plugged In,

Ah, the struggle is real! I see you, trying to juggle school work with the ever-present siren call of your phone. It’s like trying to sip tea without slurping (so impossible, right?). I do so adore your honesty, and let me assure you, you are not alone in this conundrum. In fact, I daresay you’re as on-trend as a rose-gold iPhone in a glittery case.

Now, let’s steep this situation a little longer, shall we? I have a few tips that will help you focus like a cup of chamomile – calm, composed, and oh-so-effective.

Firstly, create a “No-Swipe Zone.” Think of your workspace like the most exclusive tea party in town… no phones allowed. You wouldn’t bring your phone to the Queen’s tea table, so why should your study table be any different? Leave your phone in another room, and focus on your task like you’re savoring the perfect sip of tea – slow, intentional, and free from distractions. And if you’re like, “But what if the tea I missed out on is a scandalous notification?”… remember this: not everything deserves your attention. Not even Karen’s cat’s new TikTok.

Secondly, try the Pomodoro Technique. No, it’s not a limited-edition tea flavor (although I wish it were). It’s a productivity hack where you work for 25 minutes, then take a 5-minute break. You’ll be amazed at how much tea, er, I mean, work, you can get done when you break it up into little, manageable sips. Set a timer, lock your phone in Airplane Mode (the ultimate power move), and dive into your studies like a teapot into a steaming cup. After 25 minutes, reward yourself with a break and maybe even a scroll (if you must).

Speaking of the Power Moves… Airplane Mode. Here’s the tea – your phone, much like a thirsty little teapot, wants all of your attention, but you’re in charge of the pour! Try setting your phone on Airplane Mode when you need to study, and watch how fast your brain will clear up like a freshly brewed herbal tea. No distractions, no interruptions… just pure focus, as fresh as the first cup of morning tea. Trust me! Your mind will thank you.

Another option is background music, but make it a vibe. You mentioned using music or Netflix for some background noise. I get it – sometimes we need a little vibe to help us get in the zone. But if you’re using music, choose instrumental tracks. Lyrics can get as distracting as a soggy biscuit in your tea. So, pop on a lo-fi playlist or nature sounds, and let those vibes keep you on track without tempting you into a scrolling binge.

Remember, darling, be patient. Rome wasn’t built in a day, and neither will your productivity habits be. Just as you don’t drink your tea in one gulp, don’t expect yourself to master focus overnight. Small steps, like taking a few moments of mindfulness before starting your work or setting boundaries with your phone, will work wonders. And remember: practice makes perfect. You’re allowed a slip-up now and then, but keep it cute and get back to business. Focus is a journey, darling, not a race.

Lastly, I want to remind you that this little struggle you’re facing is so normal. Your generation has grown up in a world where everything happens right now. It’s as though every notification is a cup of tea being served immediately (how rude, right?). But you, my dear, are in control of your cup, and a little distance from your phone will give you the mental clarity you need to conquer your schoolwork like a BOSS.

Yours in tea and taming the phone beast,
Lady Hazelton, Queen of Focus and Teatime Wisdom

Dear Lady Hazelton,

I have the worst problem ever. I made a new guy friend and we hit it off right away. He’s super fun and we started to make plans together, and this whole time I thought we were just friends. Until one day I opened our texts and saw he asked if we could officially date. WHAT? He is the sweetest guy ever, I just don’t like him like that. Is there any way I could break the news to him gently and not ruin the friendship?

Thank you so much,
Lost with Love

Dearest Lost with Love,
Oh, my poor sugar cube, you have found yourself in the treacherous waters of accidental romance, where friendships are mistaken for flirtations, and the tones of texts can be mistaken while a well-placed emoji can tip the scales toward chaos! Truly, a tragedy as old as time… or  at least as old as texting.

Now, let us steep a plan before this delicate situation over-brews into heartbreak. The key here is to be as gentle as a chamomile breeze yet as firm as a well-steeped Earl Grey. Your gallant suitor has been bold in his declaration, and thus, he deserves a response that is kind, clear, and – most  importantly – quick. Let us not leave him on READ,, lest he sit by his phone in agony, refreshing the chat like a forlorn poet staring at a blank parchment.

I propose the following:
First, begin with gratitude. Let him know how much you appreciate him and value your friendship. A simple “I’m so grateful for our friendship and how much fun we have together” sets a warm and affirming tone.

Secondly, be CLEAR but KIND. The phrase you seek is something along the lines of: “I think you’re amazing, but I see us as just friends. I never want to lead you on or hurt you, so I want to be honest about that.” This ensures he understands there is no romantic possibility while reassuring him that your feelings of friendship are genuine.

Finally, reaffirm the friendship (if he’s open to it). This part will depend on his feelings, but you might say something like, “I’d still love to hang out like we always do if that’s something you’re okay with.” This keeps the door open while giving him space to decide if he needs time to recover.

Alas, my dear, we cannot always control how others receive the truth, only how we deliver it. If he needs time to nurse his wounds with some emotional scones and jam, let him have it. A strong friendship can endure an awkward moment, but a forced one will crumble like a stale biscuit.

Be brave, be kind, and for the love of all things steeped, do not panic-text an apology afterward. Trust the process, sip some tea, and let the friendship find its natural course.

With warmth and a dash of honey,
Lady Hazelton ☕✨

Dear Lady Hazelton,
Do you have any advice on selecting a college?
Signed,
Already Looking

My Dearest Already Looking,
Ah, the pursuit of higher education… truly a journey more labyrinthine than the maze of tea leaves in a pricey Oolong.  Fear not, dear one, for Lady Hazelton is here to infuse a spot of wisdom into your swirling cup of uncertainty.

First and foremost, consider this: selecting a college is not unlike selecting the perfect blend of tea. You may find yourself drawn to the rich, robust flavor of an Ivy League, or perhaps the refreshing zest of a liberal arts college with a touch of whimsy. College, like teas, come in many varieties. Some are bold, others subtle; some offer a heady mixture of opportunities, others a delicate, calming environment. Are you drawn to a bustling campus brimming with students like a teapot at a fancy soiree, or perhaps the quiet serenity of a smaller institution, where your individual brew might be better appreciated? The choice, my dear, must suit your taste, not simply the expectations of others or the allure of the label.

One must consider the “flavor” of the curriculum, as well. Will you be studying something that truly excites your soul? Or will you simply be sipping through the motions?  And let us talk campus life, shall we? College, I must say, is like a group chat with the right squad. Make sure your campus culture clicks with you. You’ll want a community that gives off vibes.

But here’s where I drop some straight tea: there is no one-size-fits-all college. You need to pick a place that is YOU, not your mom’s Pinterest board or your cousin’s neighbor’s friend who got into That University. Don’t get sucked into the “I’m going to the biggest, brightest tea party in town” mentality. Sometimes, the little-known school with fewer people can give you way more attention, better opportunities, and honestly – better tea. It’s not about flexing, darling. It’s about what makes YOU feel like you’ve just steeped yourself in the best blend possible.

Mostly, dear one, trust in the Lord, whose guidance is far more certain than any earthly path. While your heart may lead you one way, you must also listen carefully to the whispers of divine guidance. The Lord has a plan for you, my dear, one that transcends the fleeting trends and fickle desires of this world. His plan will lead you not only to a place of learning, but to a place where your gifts and talents can flourish in service to others.

So, I implore you, take a step forward with courage and confidence. Trust your heart, and trust that the Lord will not lead you astray. Trust that with a bit of contemplation and a lot of heart, you will find your perfect college brew.

With all the warmth of a freshly steeped teapot,
Lady Hazelton

Dear Lady Hazelton,
It’s a new year, which means new me! However, I am worried that the goals I have put in place aren’t going to happen. I want to try to do simple things, like working out, getting things done, not dealing with the same drama, and being more organized. Though, I have been known in the past to start something and then give up halfway through, ie. books, shows, homework, movies, trying to confess my undying affection and love for someone, chores. That is why I am seeking your advice. How do I continue to push myself to do the goals that I want? Are there ways to avoid getting stuck in “I don’t want to do this” territory? Are there any tricks and tips or am I doomed to repeat my past failures? Any advice will help me to traverse this new year!
All my love, 
The New Me

My Dearest New Me,

Well, well well – what do we have here? A new year, a new you, and oh, what goals you’ve brewed up!  I must say, I’m positively steeped in excitement to help you on this journey of transformation, where we shall conquer self-doubt, slay drama, and master the art of being organized. Think of it as a perfect cup of Masala Chai: slow, steady, and just the right balance of strength and sweetness.  

Now, first things first. Let’s talk about GOALS, my dear. The key to success here is starting with baby sips. Small steps. Tiny, digestible bits that you can crush with ease – the tea biscuits of your adorably determined world. Instead of declaring, “I must become the queen of organization,” why not commit to just 10 minutes a day of clearing up your workspace? This is your “clean up your tea leaves” moment. The more consistent you are, the clearer your path will be, just like a well-brewed cuppa.  

If you’re feeling ambitious and want to add “working out” to your list, let’s go for for micro workouts, shall we? Instead of a 90-minute gym session that feels as daunting as trying to finish a book in one sitting, try a brisk 10-minute walk. Think of it as a tea break, but for your body. And once you’ve done it a few times, you’ll start feeling like an absolute powerhouse – a full pot of tea, ready to take on the world!

Now, on to the matter of drama – an entirely different kettle of tea, I daresay. As tempting as it may be to dive into the latest high school gossip, the true art of tea-ing your way through drama is to simply… NOT. A quiet “I’ll pass” is the most sophisticated response to unnecessary chaos. Keep your energy and time as clean and clear as a freshly brewed tea bag. By disengaging from the nonsense, you’ll find that not only do you preserve your own peace, but you also free up space for your goals. Less tea-spilling drama, more tea-sipping success.

[pours another cup of tea] My sweet New Me, don’t think I didn’t notice the subtlety in your letter. You speak of wanting to confess your undying affection for someone. Oh, my tea kettle – this is a matter as delicate as the finest porcelain! But let me assure you: love, much like tea, must be brewed just right.

My advice? Start small. Just like your other goals, you’ll want to test the temperature of your teacup before fully gulping. A thoughtful compliment, an act of kindness, a casual, “Hey I think you’re pretty awesome” can go a long way. Consider these your “steeps” to test the temperature of their feelings.  Let’s face it: jumping straight into an emotional confession can be as wild as spilling hot tea all over your lap – and we don’t want that, do we?

And should you decide to go all in and spill the tea (the real, heart-steeping kind), my advice is this: be as direct and as bold as you are with your goals. A love confession doesn’t have to be dramatic or over the top. Be honest, be kind, and for goodness’ sake, be real.  Whether you express your feelings in person or in a sweetly penned letter, just know that the act of being open about your feelings is a victory in itself. No matter how the other person reacts, you’ll be walking away with no regrets. Like savoring a perfect cup of tea, nothing compares to the moment you let your heart steep freely.  

So, my darling New Me, whether you’re setting your goals for a more organized life, avoiding drama like a well-brewed cup that never overflows, or taking the plunge into the pool of love – just remember: small steps, steady progress, and most importantly, be kind to yourself. The process may not be instant, but with the right intentions and a sprinkle of patience, you’ll reach your destination with grace and warmth. And if you ever feel like you’re losing your steam, pour yourself a cup of tea and remember that even the finest blends take time to perfect. 

With all the love and support in the world,
Lady Hazelton

Dear Lady Hazelton,

Recently, I realized what I’ve been oblivious to before – that my friend is the absolute worst person anyone would want to spend time with. She’s constantly complaining about everything, hating on things me and my other friends like and talking bad about people all. The. Time. Yes, a few tea sessions never hurt anyone, but all the time? She also doesn’t say a single good thing while talking about people in their absence. She acts like she’s better than everybody else, including us, her friends.

So you can see that I need to drop her ASAP. But there is a problem: she is a part of my friend group and for some reason, my friends are still defending her for everything she does.

I just don’t get it. I love my friends, they are amazing people, I just can’t understand why they are tolerating all of this. They are being good friends, just to the wrong person I guess. Not all of my friends – some hate drama and conflicts so they just kinda ignore all of that, but there are two specific people who are defending her.

The weird thing is that she has not been nice to them at all. She also seems to have a special “bond” with me – she likes to talk and spend time with me. Which would be nice, but she very clearly ignores all the others. She barely hangs out with us (she always makes up some excuses), but when she does, she always just follows me around like a puppy and refuses to talk to anyone else. Should I be happy that she likes me? Maybe. Am I? No! That’s super uncomfortable, especially when other girls started to notice that too and have comments about it.

So, I want to stop being friends with her, but I don’t know how to do it. Like, what do I say?
Good luck. I will not sleep or breathe until your answer arrives.

Sincerely,
Slowly Losing My Mind

Dear Slowly Losing,

Ah, my dear Slowly Losing My Mind, how you’ve found yourself tangled in a friendship as bitter as
tea left too long to steep. The unfortunate truth has finally dawned upon you – that the friend
you’ve been tolerating is no more a companion than an over-brewed tea bag left to drown in its
own sourness. One can only sip on the same burnt brew so long before it ruins the entire cup. From
what you describe, this individual is no more a companion than a teapot cracked in multiple places
– tolerable at best, but ultimately incapable of holding anything of value.

As for your question – should you be happy that she likes you? – well, darling, the answer is as clear
as a cup of Jasmine: ABSOLUTELY NOT! A friendship like hers is like a bad Wi-Fi connection: you’re
always hanging on, waiting for something that never truly delivers. The “special bond” she claims
with you? Darling, it’s nothing more than an exclusive club where the entry fee is your self-respect,
and a one-way ticket to discomfort. If the only bond she has with you is making everyone else feel
less than, then trust me, it’s time to log off. Block. Unfollow.

And as for two friends who seem to be defending this… weird brew, it’s quite clear that they’re under
the delusion that loyalty to a friend means tolerating bad behavior. Alas, as the ever-wisdom-filled
Maya Angelou once said: “When someone shows you who they are, believe them.” The tea leaves have spoken, my dear, and if they choose to ignore her antics, they’ll eventually see that their loyalty will only spoil their own cup.

Now, to the hardest part: how to drop this friend without turning into the main character of a teen
drama. I got you. Firstly, SPILL THE TEA (with class, of course). The art of cutting ties with someone who’s no longer serving you is like perfecting a steep: it must be done with intention and just the right amount of finesse. My advice is to be real with her, but keep it classy. Something like: “Look, I’ve realized that
I’m uncomfortable with how things are going in this friendship. I can’t ignore how you treat others,
and honestly, I don’t vibe with it. I need to step back.” Simple. Direct. Unapologetic. And most
importantly, don’t explain yourself into oblivion. It’s your peace at stake, not a court case.

As for those defending her, you need to call it like you see it, but without the drama. You could say: “I get that you guys don’t want to cause any tension, but I can’t ignore how she treats all of us. It’s not cool, and I can’t keep supporting someone who disrespects people. I’m just not okay with it anymore.” Don’t get into the weeds of gossip or try to convince them how “wrong” she is. Let your actions speak louder than words. Sometimes, people have to figure it out on their own.

Thirdly, CUT THE CORD and BE FREE. Once you’ve said your piece, don’t second-guess it. No one
should feel like they’re dragging around the baggage of a soured relationship that’s made everything awkward. The good news is, in the end, this will 100% make space for friends who actually bring positive energy to your life – no more side-eye, no more toxicity, and no more feeling like you’re in the middle of
constant reality-show drama.

And trust, dear reader, as soon as you drop this toxic brew, your life will become a whole lot
sweeter. Remember as a fellow tea drinker so wisely put it: “You are responsible for your own
happiness. If you have to choose between being liked and being respected, choose respect.”
The universe (and your friends) will thank you for choosing the tea that nourishes, not the one that
burns. I promise, your soul will thank you, too.

Yours in bold moves and sweet sips,
Lady Hazelton, Keeper of the Steeped Truths and Master of the Unfollow Button

Dear Lady Hazel,
A few years ago I met this girl and we became friends from the start. In the last couple of months she has changed drastically and I am not sure how to handle it. I love her as a person but recently she is nothing short of negative. She always brings herself and others down and seems to be mean to everyone. I thought it was just me who noticed this, but amongst talking to my peers, this seems to be a common occurrence. I want to bring it up to her and confront her but I am not sure how. Please send help!

Signed, At a Loss

Dear At a Loss,

As I settle into my favored armchair with a steaming cup of Earl Grey, I find myself pondering the delicate nature of friendship. It is with utmost sympathy that I acknowledge your love for this once-cherished companion, now shrouded in a cloak of negativity. Such transformations can indeed stir the most tranquil of waters, leaving us to question how best to navigate these murky depths. Fear not, for the art of addressing such matters requires not just courage, but a gentle hand.

I would advise you to invite her for a tête-à-tête over tea—perhaps a fragrant Jasmine or a robust Assam. In the warm embrace of your chosen brew, create a space for open dialogue, allowing her to sip slowly on both the tea and the comfort of your companionship.

Gently broach the subject by expressing your concern, rather like offering a scone with clotted cream: with kindness and a touch of sweetness. You might say, “My dear, I have noticed a shift in your demeanor that troubles me. I treasure our friendship and wish to understand what weighs upon your spirit.” This approach may coax forth her thoughts, like steam rising from a freshly poured cup.

Should her defenses rise, as the steam escapes the kettle, reassure her of your intentions. True friends, like the finest teas, should enrich one another’s lives rather than leave a sour taste. If she responds with understanding, you may find that the shadows clouding her heart can be dispelled, one sip at a time.

However, should she remain entrenched in her negativity, it may be wise to reevaluate the closeness of your bond. Just as one would not steep a poor-quality tea too long, neither should you allow yourself to linger in discontent.

May your conversation brew strength and clarity, and may your friendship flourish anew, like blossoms blooming in the spring. Remember, dear friend, even the darkest of teas can yield a delightful cup when blended with care.

Yours in friendship and tea,
Lady Hazelton

Dear Lady Hazel,

I need serious relationship advice. So about a week before school started, I went to California with my dad and we stayed at his friends house. I went into the vacation so excited because I’d never been to that part of California. However, my entire trip took a wild turn.

So on the first day we got there, I was informed that my dad’s friend invited their neighbors over for dinner. I kinda shrugged this off because like why is this relevant, but the part that interested me was that the neighbors apparently had a son my age. I started thinking and was like “Okay, what if this kid is fine?” but shrugged it off once again because I knew that I had high hopes for nothing.

However, when the neighbors came over for dinner, I met the boy and he was VERY attractive. So much that it caught me off guard because there was like a 10% chance that my hopes would become reality. We talked a little bit and he was very nice as well. Very mature, kind, wasn’t on his phone at all when in conversations, and was very attentive to what I had to say. Me, being a hopeless romantic who has never dated anyone, immediately thought that this was a scene from a movie.

I saw him a few more times throughout this week-long trip. His mom invited me to come with him and her to the beach and then the pool (which literally SHOOK me at the time) and so I exchanged numbers with him so we could make those plans. Not much happened that day at the beach, but later that day, one of the adults informed me that this kid apparently LIKED me. This was so shocking because I had thought that it was the most one-sided thing in history. But no!

The next day he added me on Snapchat and I was actually so excited. The only thing that brought me down was the fact that I was leaving in a few days and that it would be hard to do anything about this crush because he lives across the country.

I didn’t see him after our time at the beach but we still snap each other on Snap even now (nothing serious and not even conversations but just pictures kinda).

This is kind of in the past for me now, but my dad and I are considering visiting again for Thanksgiving break and so I’m not sure what to do if I see him again. Should I do something about this? Or leave it in the past?

Sorry for such a long ramble, I have a lot to say about this matter and have had this stuff on my mind for the past two months.

Thank you again!!
Signed, A Hopeless Romantic

Dear Hopeless Romantic,

Gather ‘round, dear reader, for we find ourselves in a delightful conundrum worthy of a Regency drama, full of unexpected encounters and budding affections! Your tale reads like a scene from a swoon-worthy flick, complete with summer flings and sparks that could light up even the dullest tea party.

Ah, the allure of a summer romance! That charming lad, seemingly plucked from a Netflix original, has clearly stirred your heart. How thrilling to discover that this fine squire might just share your sentiments! Those Snapchats – though they may seem low-key – are the modern-day equivalent of passing notes in class, and they suggest he’s still vibing with you. Now, as Thanksgiving approaches, the question looms: should you dive back into this potential love story or leave it in the past like a forgotten TikTok trend?

I say, go for it! If you find yourself face-to-face with this swoon-worthy gentleman once more, strut over with the same confidence you’d show in your favorite outfit. A casual “Hey, what’s brewing?” or a cheeky “Miss me?” can break the ice and set the stage for a delightful chat, like the perfect combo of tea and scones.

Remember, the digital age has made long-distance connections totally doable. With a sprinkle of creativity, your Snap streak could turn into something epic, even if he’s all the way across the country. Distance? Just a minor glitch in the matrix!

So, dear heart, let your feelings guide you! Sip your tea, ponder your next move, and when the moment arrives, approach him with the same flair as a bold cup of Ceylon Gold. After all, life’s too short to let such a bold opportunity steep too long and go cold!

Yours in caffeinated camaraderie,
Lady Hazelton

Dear Lady Hazelton, my friend goes on and on about her boy obsession. She adds like every boy on snapchat. She hasn’t even met most of them! I thought she had a new boyfriend but now shes after another guy, what! Its insane, this girl really needs help. Do I support her with going after a boy shes never met when shes talking to someone else? I’m so unsure! I wish she’d tell someone else her boy problems, honestly. Please send help and advice!

-Stressed at Best

Dear Stressed,

It seems you find yourself caught in the whirl of your friend’s boy-crazy antics, like tea leaves swirling chaotically in a cup with no strainer in sight. The nonstop parade of new crushes and Snapchat additions sounds exhausting, and it’s no wonder you’re feeling rather steeped in stress. Fear not—I shall do my best to help you find some clarity amidst this confusion.

First, let us address your friend’s endless pursuit of new romantic interests. Her behavior, while perhaps a bit extreme, is not altogether uncommon, especially among young people still figuring out the boundaries of affection. It’s not unusual to find oneself caught up in the excitement of a new crush (or three), but her habit of flitting from one “relationship” to the next like a butterfly among tea roses does seem to lack a certain depth. It’s rather like trying to savor every tea on the menu without ever finishing a single cup.

As for your role in this, dear reader, there is no need to feel obliged to support every flight of fancy. If you’re uncomfortable with her chasing after new boys while already involved with someone, it’s perfectly fine to voice your thoughts. Approach the situation gently, like adding a splash of milk to a strong brew—soften the blow without diminishing the flavor of your message. Let her know you’re concerned that she may be spreading herself a bit too thin and that constantly seeking out new romantic attention may not be the most satisfying path. Suggest that she focus on building more meaningful connections rather than collecting Snapchat names like a box of mismatched tea bags.

And while it is noble to lend a sympathetic ear, you are not obliged to be her sounding board for every boy-related escapade. It’s perfectly fair to set boundaries and gently steer conversations away from endless talk of her love life if it’s becoming too much for you. You might suggest talking about other things you both enjoy or spending time on activities that don’t involve romantic drama. Friendships, like a good tea, should be balanced, with just the right amount of sweetness and spice, rather than overpowered by one particular flavor.

In conclusion, my dear, help your friend find a bit of balance in her romantic pursuits, but do not let her boy-crazy ways steep too long in your own mind. Life is full of more delightful flavors than just the endless pursuit of the next crush.

Yours in the pursuit of calm and balanced friendship,
Lady Hazelton

Dear Lady Hazelton, Today, at this late hour, I am writing to you about my stresses regarding school. Today I was on my senior retreat– which was great, but now I have so much work to catch up on, hence why I am writing this dignified “letter” so late at night! As I am panicking and wishing I could just go to bed, I have come to the harsh realization that this may be my fault, as I did not start my homework earlier, despite knowing of the copious amount of work that awaited me. This leads me to my first question: do you have any advice to help students get over procrastination and laziness? I am very much aware of this problem of mine, but it has become a bad habit that I can’t just automatically stop doing. I really want to work on this flaw, especially before going off to college, because college already seems hard enough.

My second and final question is, how can I build up confidence and reassure myself that everything is okay? I feel as though I get scared of every little thing that comes my way. I am worried about my grades, graduating and going off to college and living on my own, extracurriculars, and even if I am doing this very assignment correctly (I have no idea????). Thank you for your time and consideration. 

Sincerely, Frazzled at Padua

My Dear Frazzled at Padua,

Ah, the familiar and frantic late-night scramble—a ritual that many a student has experienced, often with the same fervor as a hurriedly brewed midnight cup of tea. You are not alone in this feeling, nor are you the first to find yourself caught in the tangled leaves of procrastination and stress. Fear not, for your honesty in recognizing your struggles is a fine first step, and I shall do my utmost to help you find a more peaceful path forward.

Regarding your struggle with procrastination, let us begin by acknowledging that breaking this habit is much like steeping the perfect cup of tea: it takes time, intention, and a bit of patience. Rather than trying to overhaul your habits overnight (an endeavor as impossible as forcing a pot to boil instantly), start with small, manageable changes. Set a timer for a brief period—say, fifteen or twenty minutes—and dedicate that time exclusively to your work. When the timer rings, you may take a short break to relax before resuming. This technique, known as the Pomodoro method, can help to break tasks into smaller, less daunting sips rather than forcing you to gulp down an entire pot of assignments at once.

Furthermore, I encourage you to prioritize your tasks, identifying which assignments require the most urgent attention and which can be left to steep a little longer. Make a list, and take on your work one task at a time, savoring the small sense of accomplishment that comes from crossing each one off. Avoid, at all costs, the temptation to begin with “just a little” scrolling through social media—such diversions have a habit of expanding like loose tea leaves, consuming far more time than anticipated.

Now, as for your confidence, dear reader, remember that it is perfectly normal to feel overwhelmed by the approaching transitions of senior year. The prospect of college and adult life may seem daunting, like standing before a seemingly bottomless teacup. However, remind yourself that you have handled many challenges already—your senior retreat being one of them—and emerged stronger on the other side. A little nervousness is not a sign of weakness, but rather a sign that you care deeply about your future. Let this concern motivate you to do your best, but do not allow it to paralyze you. Practice self-compassion, and remember that it is entirely acceptable to ask for help or reassurance when you need it.

Try, each day, to set aside a small moment to acknowledge what you have accomplished, even if it is something as simple as completing an assignment or participating in an extracurricular activity. Confidence, much like the finest teas, grows stronger with repeated practice. Gradually, you will find that these small victories add up to something more substantial, reassuring you that everything will indeed be okay.

In closing, take a deep breath and steep your worries with care. You are not expected to have everything figured out at once. Focus on one step, one task, and one cup of tea at a time, and soon enough, you shall find that the path before you is far less daunting than it first appeared.

Yours in the art of calm and thoughtful preparation,
Lady Hazelton

Dear Lady Hazel, 

I have been talking to a boy now for three months. He has also been talking to another girl, but he tells me that he isn’t interested in her in the same way he likes me. He just is trying to find a way to let her down gently. I definitely think he could be The One. He tells me that he wants to be in a relationship with me, but he wants to ask me in a special way. He was supposed to ask me two weekends ago, but stuff came up and he had to cancel our plans. 

Should I just ask him myself? Should I wait for him to come up with his “perfect way” of asking me out? I want to be his girlfriend, and I am ready to be in a serious relationship. What do you think?

Signed, Tired of Waiting

Giiiirrrrrrrrllllllll, sit down while I brew a pot of Rosemary tea. Why rosemary, you might ask? Well, as Ophelia remarked, “There’s rosemary. That’s for remembrance.” And I want you to remember what I am about to tell you. 

So you think this boy could be The One, hmm?  The One to do what, sweet girl? The One to break your heart? I agree. Too harsh? Bear with me.

No, he does NOT want to be in a relationship with you. Nor does he care about asking you to make it official in a special way. And as for the other girl? He does NOT want to end things with her. 

He wants to keep you both in his life… to have his tea and drink it, too.  

Sweet girl, while you believe you are ready for a serious relationship, you need to set your sights on someone who is emotionally and mentally mature enough to handle such a devotion… because that’s exactly what you DESERVE. Now before anyone accuse Lady Hazel of trashing this poor boy, hear me plainly: he is NOT ready for a one-woman relationship, and frankly, that is more than okay at his tender young age. But why, Tired of Waiting, are you willing to compromise your happiness for someone who can’t muster up the presence of scheduling to pencil you in for an official ask?? Tsk tsk. You know better, I know better, and, dare I say, HE knows better. 

So, sweet reader, DO better. Remember the lessons that serve you and learn from those that don’t. 

With love (because that’s what you are worthy of),

Lady Hazel

Dear Lady Hazel, 

Senior year is off to a bumpy start. I know there’s a lot to do – college aps, scholarship essays, AP exams and more. But the truth is, I can’t find the motivation to do ANYTHING. I’m so DONE with school. So of course I feel guilty and lazy. HOW can I make sure to finish on a strong note? 

Signed, Struggling with Senioritis…already!

Dear Struggling,

Please allow me to ruminate over a comforting cup of Oolong. 

First of all, please take heart: senioritis is a real epidemic, and unfortunately, plenty of your Padua peers have fallen prey to this pernicious plague. Lady Hazel commends you on your desire to break free of the chains that bind you to apathy and indifference. 

In other words, good job on trying to do better. 

Lady Hazel gently encourages you to take a 3-step approach to defeat these dwindling days of drudgery: 

Firstly, think about habits. The habits you cultivate now will carry into your next semester, whether you realize it or not. After all, the chains of habit are often too weak to be felt until they are too strong to be broken. Make your habits good ones. 

Secondly, realize how quickly the next month will pass. But even though time flies, it leaves a shadow in its wake – a mosaic of moments that make up your memories. Paint wisely.

Thirdly, adopt an attitude of gratitude rather than a posture of petulance. Gratitude makes sense of our past, brings peace for today, and forms a vision for our future. For what are YOU grateful? 

The end is in sight, dear senior. Breathe in deeply and sip your tea slowly.

Lady Hazel